Quintessential Ramblings: Toe Jam Tales and the Panini Thief

Toe Jam or unknown organism?

I know what you're thinking...."what is that picture to the left? It's kind of creeping me out." Well, you can imagine then, how I felt when I found this in my BATHTUB. It basically leads me to one question...Why are husbands such disgusting creatures? What effort does it take to actually rinse out the bathtub after you use it? Apparently A LOT because, it never gets done. I'm sorry if I've categorized your husband as a disgusting creature, you may not agree but, it makes me feel better to imagine that all husband's are like this hence why I have to tolerate it.

I've inspected the object in question and I can only come to the conclusion that it is none other than jam, not the kind you spread on toast or roll into a crepe (oh yum, I want crepes) but, the kind that comes from your toes, or his toes rather. There appears to also be a dog hair mixed in with the toe jam which leads me to believe (and is the only possibility) that the dog was also having a bath at the same time. There is another miscellaneous hair in the mixture, too straight to come from nether regions but, still nonsensical because my husband has a shaved head. Therefore, I also have reason to suspect that he had another short haired animal in the bathtub possibly a goat of some sort? Yep, my husband, the dog and a goat all had a bath together last night and found it necessary to leave behind evidence of said event.

In other, news my dog stole my Chicken Pesto Panini this evening (or what was left of it). Although she's apologized for her unruly behavior, I just don't see the reasoning behind making such a display out of her thievery. I'm just happy she decided to leave my Funky Monkey Smoothie untouched, however she did manage to lick it off the lid. Luckily there wasn't much of it left for her to feast on because she does not tolerate human food well and we would've had a serious case of explosive canine diarrhea had she ate more of it. Then I would've had to succumb her to another bath....with husband....and the goat.